Tuesday, Feb. 21 - Matthew, Anthony and I, along with our friends Hannah, Hailey, Emily, and their mom, Michelle, went to Lutz Children's Museum. Matthew, much like his mom, wanted nothing to do with touching that...shudder...thing, and ran off to play. Anthony thought it was fake and tried to choke it. Here he is doing "gentle touch".
Tuesday, Feb. 14 - Matthew and I making a heart for Valentine's Day. This morning he asked me to close my eyes, gave me a sweet kiss on my cheek and said "Happy Valentime's Day mommy, you're the BEST mommy ever."
Side note: kind of scary that his hand isn't that much smaller than mine...where did my baby go??
Saturday, Feb. 11 - The boys and I had just gotten to my sister's house. Their dog, Max, was a little too excited to see us...Anthony was less than thrilled. It takes him a few minutes to warm up to Max, so I end up holding him until he does.
Last night I saw a video that a dad posted to his 15 year old daughter. In this video, he reads a letter that she secretly posted on her Facebook page, where she rants about her home life, list of chores, etc.
My first thought was "Wow, it must have hurt like heck to read something like that. To be embarrassed and disrespected like that by your own child, for all the world to see." He then tries to speak to some of her complaints, mainly about making her parents coffee, cleaning, doing laundry, having to get a job, and so on. It seemed like she might have exaggerated the truth, and maybe the dad down played it a bit. Perhaps the truth is somewhere in the middle, I don't know. In any case, the video takes an interesting turn when the dad pulls out a gun and shoots her laptop, multiple times...to teach her a lesson.
I'm really trying to put myself in his, and her, shoes right now. And as hurt and disappointed as I would be if one of my children did something like this, there is nothing that would make me react like this dad. He sure taught her a lesson, a few of them actually. He taught her that, while it's not acceptable for her to air her frustrations to the masses, it is ok for him to do so in retaliation. Because he is the dad. He taught her that her feelings and needs are not nearly as important as his, because he is the dad. He taught her that she owns nothing, as he can clearly take it away (and shoot it) at the blink of an eye. Because he is the dad. He taught her that she can't go to him with problems, especially family related ones, because no matter what she is going through, it isn't nearly as bad as how he had (has) it. And he's about to make it worse. Most importantly, he taught her that she isn't deserving of the same respect he demands, he is the boss, and if needed he may resort to violence to get his point across (not necessarily towards her, but shooting a laptop isn't the most loving act).
Go ahead, say it..."wait until you have teenagers...". Fair enough. The challenges of raising an almost 5 year old and 2 year old aren't the same as raising teens. Who knows what drama the future holds for me. I do know this, though: children mirror what they see. They are sponges, soaking up the world around them. We teach respect by showing respect. We teach accountability and responsibility by modeling it. Authoritarian parenting isn't the answer. Neither is permissive. There is a middle ground where kids aren't set up to fail, aren't made to feel inferior. Where trust and respect go both ways. Where the word discipline does not mean punish, and where they know that home is safe (because the outside world may not be).
What are your thoughts on this? Opposing viewpoints are welcome :-)
Saturday, Feb. 4 - Can you tell I was the only one into taking a picture? This was right before Anthony's birthday celebration, Thomas the Train themed of course.
Ahh! My baby is 2! So bittersweet. Of course sweet because he's growing and changing and wows us with something new every day. The bitter part sneaks in when I think about the day he was born, the nights spent snuggling my little infant, his little squeaks and coos, his smell, those little hands that would hold onto my finger so tight. I could go on forever. I miss those days. But oh how I love these days. Such a joy, he is.
Happy birthday my sweet boy. We love you to the moon and stars.
