Aging.

I did it. I bought anti-aging cream. Revita-something-or-other. You know the commercial...better than the $3,000 cream. Yeah, ok. I kept staring at myself in the mirror and noticed something. I'm...gasp...aging. Not only that - I'm "aging" more on one side of my face than the other. I kid you not. The left side of my face apparently thinks it's 10 years older than the right. I don't know what age the right side of my face thinks it is, but for whatever reason it is not keeping up with the left. Which is fine...although I would prefer an even face. Right now I look like a before and after...but they are both now. Not before. Not after. During? So right now this is me:

I know, barely noticeable. But I notice it. Every morning. So back to the "anti-aging cream". Let's talk about the name for a second, shall we?? It's not anti-aging. It will not STOP me from aging. I hate to break it to you, but we all age. So yes, it's anti-wrinkle cream...which still isn't accurate because I will continue to get wrinkles. Supposedly some will just not be as noticeable as others...or at least AS noticeable as their counterpart on the other side of my face. I will let you know how Revitaface works. So far I am impressed, one use in. I felt firmness and tightening, just like the jar said I would. And you know if it says so on the jar, it has to be true.

Oh and riddle me this: This side of my face that is on the accelerated program to Wrinkle-World (which is NOTHING like Disney World, I assure you) is also the same side of my body that has the smaller boob, same boob that produced less milk for my brief nursing relationship, and has the slightly smaller hip. Coincidence? Me thinks not. My body is revolting against me. Or at least half of it is.

Disclaimer: I am not against aging, showing signs of aging, laugh lines, etc. I am against an uneven face.